Lakeside Visitor April 2010

The importance of speaking with grace and love–the subject of the past three months’ articles–is often shown negatively in scripture. We more often see bad behaviors chastised and learn what we should do. Paul, in his letter to the Galatians, gives just such an example on the heels of a rebuke to a group called the ‘circumcision’. Take a moment to read Galatians 5:13-26 and think about how speech fits into this passage. Where is your speech described here?

The more I awake to our neighbor’s fights the more I am given examples of what not to do, how I should avoid using my speech. This morning I had the pleasure of overhearing a caregiver tell her charge that she hopes the other child will beat the… well, you know, out of him. My heart breaks for this family and how they are setting themselves up for a relational fall that will leave scars that last so much longer than the moment of anger. I hear these things and am driven to God’s word to seek guidance and comfort when I think on this sin. They bite, and devour, and are consumed by each other as each outburst and challenge is returned in kind. Moreover, I cannot help but rebuke myself and strive to improve my own speech as well.

When we choose to follow Christ, our family becomes those who also follow Christ. Our neighbors (14), then, are everyone else and we are to love them as we love ourselves. Do we? Or do our fleshly deeds make mince meat of God and those unfortunate enough to be in our line of sight? The stakes are higher than right now, higher than offending someone whom we hope will get over it quickly and without the humiliation of our apology–they are nothing short of the kingdom of God. In our speech, as well as our actions, we proclaim to the world whose we are. Who do you belong to? “If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit” (25), exercise love, and practice the fruit of the Spirit.

I do not mean to throw my neighbors under the bus for public ridicule, but I do hope their story is shockingly offensive to us all. Are we offended by the behavior, offended by the retelling? Are we offended enough to admit how seldom we Christians are willing to hold our own speech and behavior up to a mirror? Are we willing to judge them while ignoring how fake and phony we are when we meet with one another? We avoid opportunities to confess our own sins because then people will know what we try to hide. We hide our sin because it’s embarrassing.* But sin does become us. We are people of unclean lips. I encourage us all to think about the legacy we leave behind for our families, children, and neighbors: will we be loved, respected, and pursued or merely tolerated until they can get away?

*Addendum: And I am the man who is bothered by these things but does nothing to help. I sit in my apartment watching the powerful, deadly drama unfold, saying I care yet doing nothing. I am the chief of sinners, but don’t care. I am calloused and cowardly. No more. It’s time for me to be changed by God’s words and be real. What good are these articles if they’re merely words on a page that don’t affect change in my life or anyone else’s?  After much deliberation to edit/rewrite something tamer, I have chosen to be real with myself and with you, come what may.